36 Comments

Over the years my PMS symptoms have just gotten stronger and more overwhelming. They really do take so much out of me and affect my productivity and mood. I become super emotional and easily overwhelmed. Ironically I don’t really want to eat anything and especially don’t want to cook. I’m still figuring out how to best deal with it but so far what has worked for me is simply rearranging my schedule to go with my cycle and have allowed myself to take a full day off the first or second day where I just lay down in silence and become a couch potato for the day.

Going for a slow , silent walk has also worked wonders for me. I don’t take my phone or anything, not even my dog and I just walk slowly and focus on my breathing. It helps with the cramps and simply calms the symptoms all around.

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Love the idea of the slow silent walk without any distractions. I do that sometimes too (during any time of the month). I’ve been skipping a day of work when I’m struggling to focus during PMS (like today). One tip I have for cramps is a hot water bottle. Works better for me than any pain killers. Thanks for your thoughtful comment!

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Thank you for such a relatable post! I’m sure many of us are struggling with similar issues! 🙏

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How does it work for you with taking a day off every month at work? I'm afraid of being criticised for that even by my Doc. Can you really do this regularly without someone saying this isn't how we handle this? 😁 I'm super curious about this and experiences of other gals. I mean, to handle the symptoms for your self is one thing, but I find it much harder in a social way. 🫣

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Hey Mee! I don’t formally request a day off. I just check in here and there throughout the day but allow myself to NOT be productive. It’s important to mention that I’m a freelancer, so I’m not as involved in the day-to-day of meetings, etc., making it easier to slack off for a day. But if you’re full time with a company, maybe you can just mention you’re not feeling well (without any explanation) and then rest a bit. Pls take this tip with a grain of salt, because I don’t know your full work situation. Feel free to share more/ask more if you’d like to! :)

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I LOVE that you’re writing about this, it should definitely not be taboo.

I must admit I am way less reflective when I have my PMS lol but I do try and keep an eye on my Clue (period) app to see when my period will be and to make a mental note of my PMS the week prior. Because good God PMS be a vicious bitch. 😅😅 I definitely try and give myself grace, and always apologize when I am in a calmer mood to those I need to apologize to lol aka the kid and the cat. 😅 Although it never ceases to amaze me how often I forget that I’m PMS-ing when I am. It’s such a mental warp lol

OMG Slack notifications for PMS week is a hilarious and brilliant idea. 😂😂

ALSO!! I am Team Flex Disks allll the way!!! I started using them 4 years ago and absolutely love them. I’ve never tried the cup cuz I’m way too nervous about it not being sanitized properly so that would stress me out and I don’t like tampons because I’m worried I’ll get TSS lol

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Thanks for your thoughtful comment, Megan! I bought Flex discs once but then I was too much of a pussy (pun intended hehe) to try them out. I should try again. Sometimes I bounce between thinking I should apologize to people but also thinking THEY should give me grace. Periods aren’t easy… 🩸

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😂 I was SO scared to try flex disks the first time… they seem HUGE! 😳 but I was like if you birthed a baby this is nothing 🤣 And shockingly they go right up in there, and I can’t feel a thing!

And yes… I do think it should be a balance of people giving grace and… myself acknowledging my behavior lol.

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Yeah, you’re right. Self-awareness is a superpower. I haven’t given birth, but you’re still making me feel better about the discs. I’ll consider again! 🙏🏻❤️

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I got my first menstrual cup a few years ago, and I haven't looked back. It's all over and done so much more quickly! (and you don't need to worry about it getting lost/stuck)

I sometimes find myself wondering 'why am I feeling low/moody/irritated/out of sorts' and then it dawns on me, ohhhhhh 🤣

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I have those “aha” moments too! Lol Fun times. Is there a specific menstrual cup brand you prefer?

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I’ve had Floweret, Unfabled and nixit so far, happy with them all 😊

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Thanks! I’ll check those.

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Same, try not to force myself to do anything I don’t want to do. Eat what i want, lie around all day if that’s what i need and do as few regular life things as possible

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That's a golden nugget! "Do as few regular life things as possible." 👌 Thanks for sharing!

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I hibernate at least on days I can’t handle. Means avoid everything except food and sleep. Even work. I can handle my periods better. But PMS is a tough one. But recently I found writing makes me feel better. Ooh I also do planning for my wishlists and ideas.

I’m a cup gal. Using it for the past 4 years. Never ever thought of going back to pads. Just love the comfort. No rashes. No disposing hassles.

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Writing also helps me! And just allowing myself time and space to rest and not worry about all the things I “should” be doing. Is there a particular cup brand that you like? Now I’m on the hunt… 🔎

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I use a brand called SafeCup, US based product.

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I’ll check it out! Thanks.

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Navigating changes in my mood during my cycle has taken on a new aspect since I entered the perimenopause . I now no longer know exactly when my cycle is going to start or stop for that matter. It does love to catch me out. However, I have started to notice some warning signs so I can prepare myself and my partner, friends etc for the mini Godzilla that's about to arrive. I am more emotional than I used to be when on my period, there is also a lot more period pain . On the plus side, I use the restlessness that comes with it to try and do some tasks that have been needing done for a while like the gardening.

I'm not a tampon, pad or period cup person. I've found the most comfortable and efficient thing for my flow has been incontinence pants.

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Hi Lorna! Thanks for your thoughtful comment.

First, can I ask how old you are? I'm 39 and my period cramps and mood-swings have also gotten worse as I get older. I'm still very regular though. I'm sort of wondering at what age I'll enter perimenopause. Or if I have already?

Second, "mini Godzilla" — I love this name for PMS... I might start using it.

Third, about using restlessness to your advantage, that's smart. I wish I could redirect that energy (I guess maybe I just did with this post), but generally I circle around a certain topic or thing for way too long and make myself anxious. I think doing physical things is always a good idea... like gardening!

Fourth, when you say "incontinence pants" do you mean like those briefs? Or do they have straps like a diaper? Do your pants get puffy? I'm just curious... because I'm a tampon gal and sometimes (usually after a few days), I don't want to keep putting something up there. Sometimes I just risk it when I'm around the house. 🤞🩸

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I'm 42 but have been in this stage for about a year/18 months. Both my mother and sister started early.

Mini Godzilla is the nearest description I can get to when it comes to describing my moods. Feel free to use it.

It took me a while to work out that using the restless energy was better than it making me feel worse.

I do mean those briefs though I use the full pant version. I haven't found that the brand that I use get puffy. No tampon or cup was ever going up there and I got so fed up with pads moving, not sticking, bunching up etc that I looked for an alternative. Incontinence pants do the job for me.

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I actually don't know when my mom started perimenopause. I should have asked her, but it's a little late now. She has Alzheimer's, unfortunately. Maybe I'll ask my aunt (her sister). About the rest, thanks again for joining the convo!

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No problem. It is one of those topics people should talk about but sadly, people still feel that they shouldn't or feel uncomfortable doing so.

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Yeah, 100% I’m with you on that! I hesitated a bit myself, but I feel great about it now. :)

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trying not to quit my job in hormonal rage for four days every single month has definitely proven the most difficult to handle

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Oof yeah that sounds rough, but I can assure you I totally relate!

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I used to have incredibly bad PMS, literally having to take days off work. Now that a lot of it is under control I still feel really off on those days. It's so important to just be kind to ourselves sometimes. Eat the greasy food and binge watch a show. It's ok!

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Yesssss🙌🏻 I’m glad you were able to improve your symptoms!

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Well I think a productive Substack morning on a PMS day is an absolute win! Well done, you.

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I couldn’t agree more! ;)

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Yeah, we should write about this way more!! I truly believe in scheduling our lives around our menstrual cycle, because we are not like men... we are wired different...

I wrote about that in one of my blogs: https://irenevangent.substack.com/p/why-crafting-your-life-is-more-important

So yeah, I try to be alone a lot in these days, especially without my partner, because things can get heated these days...

but I also try to navigate it in a different way since a while... trying to do the good stuff, so eat well, meditate a lot and give myself the natural medicines I need, like walking, swimming, ceremonial cacao and all the things I like... and it lessens the pms, woohoo.

And I have been a cup girl for a long time... You never loose it, is totally impossible... But you have to find a good one that fits you... I bought one in India, but I was saw a brand that made their cups from bamboo and that one sounds really good. I am swapping now between pads and cups, no tampons for me, I have a feeling they are very unhealthy for you uterus...

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I’ll check out your post, Irene! That’s smart to take time alone. I’ve thought about doing more of that during my period week too. Everyone’s responses about the cup not getting lost up there are making me feel more comfortable. haha. I realize it can’t actually get lost, but it just makes me nervous (I guess). Thanks for your thoughtful comment!

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I was scared at first too, and it takes some time to get used to it. But I am very happy with the ease of it. And taking time off is in my opinion something we alle should do more, it was normal for women to do that, they gathered and were still together... I'll write about that too soon again!

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So relatable 😅

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Our bodies are amazing… but… 😈🤞

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